Ok I have been writing a ton of commercial stuff, in between working on two records, a DVD release a pilot, my day job stuff. Not to mention the basemen t got flooded today so here is a lit of extremely bad ideas that you shouldn’t do:

Completely Bad Ideas:
1. Tossing porcupines
2. Eating week old sushi
3. Getting in a staring contest with Charles Manson
4. Having dinner with Rosie O’Donnel and Donald Trump at the same time
5. Entering a demolition derby with a bike
6. Eating a bag of uncooked rice then drinking a gallon of water
7. Starting a heroin habit
8. Drinking an entire bottle of maple syrup
9. A Herve Vilachez movie marathon
10. Wrestling Boars
11. Being the guy in the Burger King costume
12. Taking any job working for Britney Spears
13. Being the Director of tourism in Norman Oklahoma
14. Starring in an ad for any of the following :adult diapers, toilet paper, feminine hygiene products, any sort of chat line
15. Getting into a slapping fight with.. well with anyone
16. Financing any movie where the stars were discovered on American Idol
17. Snorting Bees
18. Pickle based beverages
19. Carbonated Milk
20. Marshmallow based entrees
21. Blogging when you haven’t slept for a few days

The problem with being an essayist is that you need a constant supply of topics, then of course you need a fresh perspective on them. Then of course there are the days that you have zero inspiration or good ideas. Well in fairness I have had plenty of good ideas just not for the blog. I figured out a great marketing app for a company, wrote a couple of good little schemes, plotted a couple of plots. Then for the pithy blogasy (blog/ essay…like I said not great in metaphor today). I did come up with several horrible topics, so those I would like to share:

1. Anderson Cooper is a horseman of the apocalypse
2. Condoleezza Rice is just misunderstood
3. Mitt Romney on Barack Obama
4. Why Betamax was the superior format
5. Mick Jagger and Keith Richards: the secret love
6. Ruby on Rails: who cares
7. Brian Eno: Genius or Wanker
8. Mac, Pc or Stone tablet
9. Is Larry King actually dead?
10. Why do women and Mickey Rourke like small unattractive dogs?
11. How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck would?
12. Rosie O’Donnell VS Trump, Godzilla Vs Mothra only not as cool
13. Why did they make Spider-Man dance, and be emo?
14. Fish tacos natures perfect food.

Hmm I might have something that Larry King thing though….